ok have some questions to answer and some thoughts to share and some splaining to do .... :)
1st... I decided to bake tonight... making cinnamon rolls. rather time consuming endevor to start at 1120 pm but its all good I can blog while I wait on the bread to rise.
so to address some comments...
1.tonjia... I am not making sweet potato casserole for christmas LOL if she wants some with marshmellows she can make it. :) as for her helping to put up the tree... oh the wars that have happened here over the years putting up a tree... it is not pretty. She can come pick one or more of the trees she and stephanie and I made over the years they are little made from coat hangars and oh so cute... lights and all.
2.JOJO... thank you... I am glad to know that you are here :)
3. tracy d. Thank you too you are a voice of calm reason who has been there done that got the stinkin t shirt... love ya.
4. Tonjia again :) YOU MUST SET YOUR PREFERENCES TO EMAIL SO I CAN EMAIL YOU A RESPONSE TO YOUR COMMENTS! PLEASE!!!!!
5. Darling Debbie A... Thank you Call me anytime...and NO we are INSIDE... massive house cleaning coming when the weather breaks...
6. Bluebird... thank you, you are so correct this is my place but, when I hit the really dark times I feel badly dumping on all of you and especially this season when I really need to be counting blessings. you see I know the answer to my stress and pain...but sometimes turning it all over is so hard. plus I made commitments to my child, my husband, my grand children and I don't take those lightly so some of my involvement is my own fault. I can not just walk away or turn my back.... whoops slipped into a different comment but gonna leave it here will elaborate in a bit.
7. MPMAMA LOVE YOU TOO! lil sister and I were just talking about you... :) all good of course !
8. TSANNE My confirm word happened to be "shedism" as in: Those of your friends that know and love you the very best had many many "SHEDISMs" to offer to you. Hmmm....I really like this ~Shedism~ one gal's support of another! I really like this too!
9. Flea... love you babe... but I can NOT lie in the bed all day... my bones wont let me do more than about 5 hours tops... then I have to get up a while then can go back later ususally for about another hour... maybe 2
artheritis lives in both my shoulders and I am thinking it is moving to my neck with the pain I have been having... and I eat tylenol like candy... I can not take NSAIDS or I so would... as for stepping back and letting them talk/ yell ect... thats pretty hard to do when the only reason Martha is allowed here is because of me... Michael barely speaks to her... and like I reminded her today.. he has disowned her. as for Michael and Mike talking... wont happen... because I refuse to allow my husband to live out his life in jail for murder...He loves ME enough to allow me to help martha and in turn to some degree Mike but believe me when I tell you he does NOT like it at all.
10. Grandma Tillie... see number 4 please... :) and... number 9. It is IMPOSSIBLE to allow them to Duke it out when Michael will not allow Mike to be here... and he has that right. My husband told martha 3 YEARS before she decided to leave home and live where she is that HE WOULD NOT HAVE A DAUGHTER IF she chose that life style. He told her many many times how he feels and why he feels that way and she CHOSE to defy him and his beliefs and NOW she must live with the consequenses of her decisions.
YES Jesus came lived and died and rose again for my peace and happiness and eternal Life... and I gladly accept that yet in the mean time I have to live and I HAVE PUT MYSELF IN THE MIDDLE... and I know it.
I get squished at times and have to break out... and say what I think to them all... and today when martha texted me that she does not want to be with mike and that she ment it... I had a FLASH of HOPE.
2 hours later she killed it... when she said that she is giving him ONE LAST CHANCE...
again my question to you dear daughter... DO YOU HONESTLY BELIEVE THAT HE IS GOING TO GROW UP AND CHANGE?? I don't but, AGAIN you must live with your decisions and in turn so does your daughter.
Then at 220 when she came over to get trash bags and bring baby things over to be washed and sorted... I wanted to have some time with her to talk to her to see what was going on and see if she was ready to really talk to me... then HE walked IN and it PISSED ME OFF TOTALLY and I could not contain myself... and said NO you cant just come here nothing has changed here ... blah blah blah... to which he said he was only here to help. as in carry heavy things... so I felt like a heel for 3 seconds.... then told him to get what they came for and go... then HE PISSED ME OFF IN A HUGE WAY.... by saying that my husband best not try to come to the hospital... blah blah... to which I spat out that he has nothing to worry about there... before I could engage my brain mouth filter... from there things got a bit ugly but not out of control. and they left and I wrote to keep from exploding.
I REFUSE to defend my husbands beliefs or feelings and I refuse to allow MARTHA AND MIKE to try to blame this shit on him as it is THEIR choices that have us in this place... but you see the LONG message I wrote to mike was a waste of my time as he has never gotten to see it because MARTHA chose not to show him. So HE really has NO CLUE where I come from or where My husband comes from in our feelings. All he thinks and believes is that Michael does not like him because he is black and thats not true. and you ladies, and man that I know of that reads my blog, just do NOT have a clue how close I came to JAIL time today when he spouted off about HIS BEING A MAN... OH MY GOD.... I have bruises on me from my table and proabably a few less hairs on my head as I grabbed my head and PULLED to keep from throwing him off my porch....
anyway I decided to bake tonight... have cinnamon buns rising in the oven...( duh told you all that earlier) its a bit chilly here in the house so have to create a warm place for them and Michaels work will love him tomorrow as one pan will go with him. I would take pics but... I feel bad that I can't share with you all (sides that if you could JUST SMELL THEM) ...DROOL... so if you love cinnamon rolls and want some you will either have to come here or kidnapp me to your home to make them :)
in talking to my sister tonight we decided that she will come here the week after christmas for THE WEEK... I am not sure which of us is more HAPPY :)
oh yeah Debbie B... ys her name is pronounced HALO as in the thing above an angels head in pictures... middle names are Alaiah pronounced A LAY AH - Juliette... I prefer Alaiah myself but, she will eventually show what she prefers...
trying to think of other questions I have missed answering... but for the moment I can't think of any.
Just finished making the butter cream cheese icing and OH dear... it smells so good... and the buns are a cooking... and the smells I am sort of surprised Michael has not gotten up to see what the heck I am doing LOL.
I keep hearing sleet on the roof .... and am not liking that will be solid ice in the morning I am afraid and that is just not good in the south... guess the good news is it is supposed to be above freezing by noon ... but raining...ok have hit babble time... so thank you all for commenting and I will hopefully have more positive than negative to write about.
Love hugs and Cinnamon buns. SORRY AFTER I HIT PUBLISH THE ROLLS GOT DONE AND I NEEDED ONE...AND SO I HAD TO TAKE A PIC FOR YOU... oh my GOD... they are SINFUL!