Friday, May 13, 2011

I have always been totally honest and blunt...

here on my blog, I decided a long time ago that if I was going to choose to blog it then what ever I blogged is nothing less than what I would say to you face to face if we were ever to meet.
to days post which in essence will be about this week (thank you blogger for being down, GAH)
It has been the week from hell and I have been holding up the glass far too long (see my post about stress a few posts back, I don't know how to link to it, so sorry you will have to seek it out if you want to understand what I mean)
Things with Martha have been on the edge of rocky to say the very least but, I can deal with her... I simply have come to the end of my tolerance and patience with her child's sperm donor. 
ever since Good Friday when she left him for a day things have been very subtly building.
Its not any one little thing but the culmination of over a year of crap that has finally put an end to our relationship.
I have told her for the past several weeks that the game she is playing the "I'm not with him yet I live with him" does not work in the real world.
yet it is mine and my husbands fault that it has come to this (yeah right believe that if you choose)
We have asked him, Mike, to not drive in our yard to use the turn around as we have worked our butts off and spent a lot trying to get the grass to grow planting sod and trying to stop the washing.
YET, he is determined to drive in it just to make me mad and see what I will do.
so I TOLD HIM and TEXTED HIM and HER and told them what I would do. I also told her and HIM that HE is no longer welcome in my yard for any reason and to never return here or if he chooses to then what I would do.  He sent several texts telling me what a horrid raciest hermit redneck I am and that I should do what I gotta do.
SO, when push comes to shove and he came here AGAIN today 20 minutes after I told MARTHA NOT TO BRING HIM HERE... I did what I had to do.
I don't think either of them thought it through enough to realise that today it would not be JUST ME here that Michael comes home early on Fridays and He had his fill long ago.
So now reports have been filed and the next time he comes here he will go to jail.
Martha drew her own line as well by texting me and telling me I no longer have a daughter or granddaughter and that it is my husbands fault and that he made the decision for her... which we all know is bull shit and her way of trying to guilt me. It's not working.
does it make me sad?  yes.
Does it make me happy that it's come to this? No.
Will I roll over and die? NO
Will I still be here to help her when she finally decided she has had enough and is ready to make a life for herself that does not include him?  Yes.
Do I love Halo... yes UNCONDITIONALLY, as her sperm donor says I don't. too bad for Martha and Halo that they do not know what unconditional love means.
I does not mean that I am here to be at your beck and call when you need something and does not mean that I will let you abuse me and just take it and take it forever...
anyway... I took these pictures today and will treasure them as I don't know when or If I will ever see Halo or Martha again.
 Halo Smiles a lot but NOT for the camera!  I almost caught one!
 Bradley will miss Halo something horrid as he loves her so much and always looks for her first thing when he comes in.
 He is such a sweet boy it is so hard to believe he is 2 years old already... tomorrow is his birthday party at the lake... I hope it does not rain... at the lake :) it can rain here all day long and I wont be sad.
 Halo is rolling over from her belly to her back but today she was busy scooting and trying to catch up with Bradley.
 He was busy trying to help her and of course show off a bit as he is a tiny bit ham.
 She would about break her neck to see where he is and what he is doing.
 He laid down and they had a big conversation
 I held her up in a sitting position She does not like to sit she loves to STAND.
Bradley tried to help... it did not last long :)

anyway... I am emotionally spent... and physically bent... and totally at a loss at what else to say....
Hope you have a good weekend... God bless.

14 comments:

TonjiaT said...

so let me get this straight, the sperm donor thinks he can call all of the shots??? sounds like he needs an attitude adjustment to me, if he had been carrying on like that in my dads yard he would have been looking down the barrel of a shotgun!!

Laura, I am so sorry that MJ has sunk to his level. using little Halo as a pawn is just because she is so immature. Who is she going to get to babysit Halo now? Is she going to graduate? Is she going to go out and get a job to support her child?? Can they pay rent and utilities and buy groceries?

I hope this problem can be resolved quickly, but I totally understand that you and your husband have to do what you have to do. I feel bad for you, I know you must be frustrated...

you are in my prayers..

joanne said...

Oh Peach, I'm sorry, no one needs this crap in their lives. I'm so proud of you for standing up and doing what is right...someday M will remember your example as a good thing. Take a breath and get some rest.

Halo is growing so darn fast...scooting already, wow! She's about six weeks older than my g-baby and I can see what a difference a few weeks makes.
Bradley is a charmer as always and it sure looks like he has healed well. Sweet little punkins.

take care, be strong...

Debbie said...

Oh Laura, I am so sorry you are going thru this. For the sperm donor to say you do not love Halo is rediculous. There is no way you could not love her, she is part of you, Michael and MJ. I pray one day, MJ will wake up and see what she is doing. To use Halo against you, after all you have done to help her with Halo is just plain wrong. I too am glad to see you are standing ground and not giving in to letting them run all over you. One day when MJ matures she will look back and see how wrong she is, and how easy a life she could have had without that sperm donor.
You get some much needed rest my friend, and know we all love you and you are in our thoughts and prayers.

God Bless~
Debbie

Debbie said...

Everyone has pretty much said exactly what I was going to say and I'm in agreement with them.

I know this hurts you both to have MJ act like this, but you're right to finally say ENOUGH. You've bent over backwards, sideways and done flips for them and obviously they do not appreciate anything.

I pray MJ gets her shit together and realize what an idiot she's being. I have no hope for the sperm donor.

Hon, please take care of yourself and rest, enjoy your sweet adorable Bradley. I really don't feel this will last long on MJ's part. She'll smarten up, hopefully.

Love you!!

abb said...

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Bluebird49 said...

I know of nothing more to say than what everyone else has said. I know you're down--but you're strong and you've got your husband, and your son and Steph and Bradley.
MJ will be back when she figures out the donor person is not going to love her like youall do.

What pain you are going through--and I am so sorry for it. It's NOT YOUR FAULT.

My Two Army Brats said...

Hugs!!

Tracy DeLuca said...

I am proud of you for standing up for yourself. HUGS Everyone has said what I would say already.... just know we all love you! MJ will come to her senses one day, probably sooner than you think.

Ellen said...

I hope you get the opportunity to throw his ass in jail. Then maybe Martha will come to her senses and she'll leave him.

Prayers and good thoughts to you and your husband.

Bluebird49 said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Bluebird49 said...

Honey--all you have to do to "link" is to go to the page you blogged that post about stress on, and up to the address bar a the top, right click, highlight it and click to "copy" that address which happens to be :
http://silenceisbroken2.blogspot.com/2011/04/true-meaning-of-stress-as-taken-from.html

When you write the blog post you want to refer to it in, and mention the word " stress post" or whatever word you'd like to refer to it--just highlight that word. Then left click the word "Link" (it's to the left, beside the little image where you insert your pictures) at the top of where you write your post. Just left click on it. It will have a place to put that address you've copied. Just right click to paste that http://silenceisbroken2.blogspot.com/2011/04/true-meaning-of-stress-as-taken-from.html
into the little space it gives you. Then click "Okay" at the bottom of that, and you are GOOD TO GO.

I hope that wasn't too confusing.I'm not that great at explaining things. It took me a good while to figure that out too, but it was fun when I learned!

Alice said...

You know I am here whenever however I can help. Keeping you all in our prayers. Stay strong and stand firm. Doing the right thing isn't always easy....love you, friend.

Unknown said...

I don't envy you at all. I guess in the grand scheme of things, I don't envy them either. It makes you wonder how much of a mess things can get before they get better. Stay strong. I know that's a cliche but I'm not sure what else to say about a situation such as this.

Flea said...

Oh Peach. I'm so sorry. I wish it hadn't come to this, but it pretty much had to, didn't it? Maybe now one or both of them will choose to grow up. Growing up seems to take forever. I'm so sad for you, especially with Halo. {{{HUGS}}}