maybe the tornado is slowing

it has been a whirlwind of stuff....
We did manage to go to Illinois for the funeral we left last thursday evening when Michael got off work.  we drove to clarksville tennessee and stopped for the night, then drove the rest of the way in the next day and managed to even rest about an hour before we had to be at the funeral home.

I had to cover my face and laugh... ok giggle a little ... even though it really was not funny.   Poor Michael does not wear his dress clothing often.  and he has gained some weight.  those poor dress pants and that poor suit... Im sure his hips will never recover... thing is he fluxuates so little in size it never even occoured to me that he might not be able to wear them.  he hopped he cussed he sucked his gut in and he finally just put his belt on and prayed a little prayer that the pants would make it through the evening.  and they did... His suit was even tighter... no tie was going on since the shirt could not be buttoned... and I finally managed to get his suit pants hooked ... HE DID NOT TAKE THEM OFF TILL WE GOT HOME!  I could not believe that after the funeral when I ran to change to jeans along with everyone else he said here take my coat I will just ride home in this.

Anyway the visitation was 5 hours for us because we had to be there a bit early... and let me tell you... in 5 hours there was NO slowing of people who came... I have NEVER seen so many except possibly for when Mikes momma passed that was a HUGE bunch too.

The funeral was Saturday morning and again a HUGE croud came.  it was one of the nicest funerals I have ever been too, I actually liked what the pastor had to say and the music was fantastic... I had forgotten that Jeannes favorite song is also one of my favorites.  and the ride to the cemetary was long but we had dad jordan and judy and ronnie with us so we all chatted up a storm and made the ride pass quickly.  (it was a couple towns to the cemetary) 

We stayed long enough to enjoy the lunch that the church provided... as the winter storm threat made us all decide to head to our homes right after ... Mike and I had originally planned to stay till sunday... we are so glad w ecame on home... we got caught in bad rain from collinsville all the way into Kentucky.  then just wonds and sprinkles... but on sunday the entire part of Tennessee that we had to travel was FLOODED and in horrid rain mess.  

and apparently we still can not load pictures from our computer any more... so I cant help but wonder... is there a different site a better blog place... I have blogged off and on for many years my original blog was a yahoo blog... I have had two here on blogger but I dont like this not being able to load pictures from my computer.  How rediculous is that?

well I have been job hunting and am super suprised to see how FEW LPN jobs there are around here ... Iknow it has been in the RN phase that comes around every so many years but sheesh ... I need to go to work like ... last year... GAH.  oh well God is in control. 

Time to get back to job searching.  have a wonderful day! love and hugs.

I am ...

really ticked at my self... I know my photo taking has gone to hell in a handbasket thanks to this stupid cat scratch bullshit with my darn eye but apparently the last time we saw jeannie and dad she eluded all photos the most I got of her in any picture is from knee to foot... and to give a bit of credit to her she did threaten bodily harm to anyone taking her picture.... I thought for sure though that I had taken at least one of her and halo... and I may have done so and simply cant find it right now... which pisses me off ALMOST as much as what ever bull crap Blogger is doing with loading photos from my computer... Anyone KNOW what the hell is up with that.????

Anyway back to real life... It is my sad duty to report that last night my step mother passed away.  She as anyone who is on facebook knows has been very very ill since before thanksgiving.... and in the hospital since the monday after thanksgiving... 
so until I can get a proper picture loaded... thank you  for keeping out family in prayer and
RIP Jeannie Feb20 1950 - Jan 7 2013 you will be very missed!

did you know....

that in your stats page it shows what key words or terms are used that come up with hits on your site?  that there are some really Bizzare things keeping an eye on your site? 
Oh well I decided MANY years ago that I would not put anything on my blog that I would not either say to a persons face or not care if the WHOLE world knew what I was putting ... So suffice it to say yeah I put A LOT out there on here but, always KNOW there is a WHOLE LOT MORE that never makes it on my blog :)

I learned that someone I love is in a federal prison because she made a stupid mistake... Unfortunately unless my daughter changes who she messes with and what she does she may end up somewhere like this woman has... so heartbreaking.

my sinuses are driving me slightly nuttier than normal... so bear with.

Still have not heard anything on my step mother... which disturbs me to an extent.... but, will have to trust that no news is good news.

I am slightly ticked off I bought a new calendar ... never realised that it is a 2012 - 2013.... how does a store ... oh never mind it was walmart after all... It should have clicked in MY head BEFORE i bought it and wrote all in it... gah... damn thing was 7 bucks ... oh get over it already.

welp apparently I can not upload any pictures for your pleasure of veiwing ... come on google/ blogger get it together I am really easy to please.

Have a wonderful  4th of  January... all 19 minutes thats left of it.

I have things.....

I really want to say but, I can't recall if I have told a couple people about my blog... And I really do not want them to read what I have on my mind.

Soooo that being said I will talk / write about something totally unrelated... I got the darn resume done this morning... and after a good bit of cusing and threatening to toss/ throw/ beat with a baseball bat the  printer did make me some copies of it.  so next comes the filling out of applications... GOD I HATE THIS PROCESS... Bring the job I need to me please!

I went to lunch with Jeanette today... it was nice ... we ended up at  Long horn steak house... I think in many states it is called texas roadhouse or something like that... anyway it was delish... then we went to several stores... I needed a new planner/ calendar ... I keep up with bills ext with them and this years did not extend into January to allow me to procrastinate .... sigh... and I needed a toothbrush... apparently Martha got the last  I had here when she was here...

I wish I could have someone make shoes to really fit my feet... I have flintstone feet... they are very big and wide... super wide... and even in my WIDE nike shoes my toes feel scrunched and abused after only a short time being in them.... My super expensive New balance that I bought oh.... 10 years back... are actually flipping NARROW and like new since i never wear them... new balance were KNOWN for being wide shoes. My off brand berkenstocks are shot but I got my 12 dollars worth from them... and my poor 5 yr old berks are shot too...in fact both pr of tennis shoes that I own are like new because I rarely wear them.

I wonder... maybe there is a shoe maker in Augusta??? I just dont know.

DEBBIE... check out ABDUCTED on Net flix... we watched it tonight ... Another good choice!

Have I mentioned that my pecan pie... turned out amazing??? I am still totally shocked at how easy it is to make... maybe I will make another in june or something :)

Talked to two different nurses today for mother... and got a message from her dr as i missed his call when I was driving.  Shes ok... she still will not speak to me unless she has to... I suspect she feels some guilty.. as she should ... but she will eventually rationalize and what ever burr is up her butt will be my fault... but thats ok... I can take it :)

No word today on step mother... last call I got last night was that she was to have fluid drained off her lungs again... sigh.. find the cause please then you can fix the problem... i hope.

well it is nearly 1 am and I have to get up in the morning...

have a wonderful Friday...

28 years ago....

on New years eve I took my father to his FIRST AA meetings... it was an alkathon... 24 hours straight of meetings, coffee, game room, SOBRIETY...
I have my fathers permission by the by to break his anonymity...
I had been sober a bit over a month at the time... and knew if something did not change my dad would be dead soon.  I could not bear the thought.  granted a little over a year later I went back out for some double checking ... but, not dad he embraced the life and changes and dove in 110% and has never doubted the fact that he was home.

I had a lot of reasons to double check and test ... but tonights not the time to go into them... Point is I am proud of him 28 years clean and sober is FREAKIN AMAZING!

He called a bit ago to tell me how jeannie is doing... shes very depressed... we reminised about oh 26 -27 years back when we met her ... The dr's very confident that she is going to make a full recovery... it's simply going to take a very long time.  SO we continue to pray :)

it was a very quiet new years day... just mike and I and net flix and dvds, collards, peas, ham, pecan pie all day... He goes back to work tomorrow :(  I have gotten used to having him home and he has gone to the stores with me ... ALL of the ones I went to... this is HUGE people JUST HUGE... and I dont expect it to continue all that often.

I have not talked to mom since thanksgiving... HER choice I have spoken to nurses, doctors, family... and she's in their opinions ... slowly declineing.. well as of feb 7th it will be 8 years since she went into the nursing home, so i think slow decline is NORMAL.

here  are a few pictures from 2003 and 04...
this one is dad in the chair and Lto R around him... martha, me cory jeannie and jennifer.... not too long after this was taken jennifer stopped talking to her mom...sigh ...

 this is mom it was 2002 taken with my first digital 1.5 mp pen cam... it took really horrid pics but it was the first one out... and I paid a dang fortune for it.

 I believe this was the last time she came to my house...  .it was 2004.  She was falling a lot back then looking back I am pretty sure she was overloaded on drugs... all RX by the way... she had one suit case that was ALL medications.

 this was taken in 2003... they used to be so close... it really hurts my heart how they treat each other now.

 the original pond... :) the fish were so little... again 2003

there are 9 fish in the pic can you find them all... there were about 20 when this was taken... in 03.. before Mikes mass murder in 04

well technically this will be my second post for today so ... Happy New Years day!  hope you have the best year ever! love & hugs

Happy New Year 2013 :)

I made a pecan Pie, the first ever in my life... it looks delish.

 It smells SOOOOOOO yummy but we have resisted cutting it ... till tomorrow...
ummmm today later... and I am NOT beyond pecan pie for Breakfast :)

I have collard greens with pork loin in one crock pot on low...
and Pink eye peas with bacon in another
and a ham in the fridge ready to heat up in the oven in the morning... it only needs a couple hours to warm :) 

We are doing the free month of net flix, watched this goofy movie tonight... I think bradley WILL love it as he can watch his favorites... I think they have it at their house and he has his favorite shows...

I however PLAN to watch the ENTIRE umpteen years 143 episodes of BONES ... I LOVE bones... and have never seen MANY MANY so it will be fun to see all.

i have managed to sort about HALF of the photos I loaded from 2003 on.... maybe I will get more of them done today later.... we shall see. cory  stephanie and bradley are supposed to come over sometime today and eat :) I have a present for them....

on face book there has been this idea floating around it is what I would call a gratitude jar...
anyway I have a half gallon jar two note pads and pens for them...

and on the jar it says
Write good things on the paper and put them in the jar, supprise gifts, accomplished goals, beauty of nature, laugh out loud moments memories worth keeping, daily blessings... then at the end of 2013 take them all out and read them.... I think in their case and mine as well I may need to take them out at the end of each month ...

anyway I think it will help a lot ... I hope so anyway.

well I did my yearly bring in the new year with my aunt betty via phone, many years we play farkle over the phone... there is a lot of trust involved to not cheat LOL.. we both love to play enough and cant be bothered to cheat...this year we just talked and I got food going and cleaned up.

well I just wanted to pop on and wish you ladies a happy new Year and cant wait to see how things go in 2013!